2nd day

Well, at 12 am my hands got itchy so i replied him saying thanks for the wishes, he replied very fast to my surprise saying good luck again..and i immediately deleted it off...

My manic monday

paper sucked coz i could not remember what i studied

sleep and fooled around not preparing for the next paper..

anyway, tempted a few times to msg him or waited for his msg coz I miss him stupidly...

However, manage to refrained from doing so..kudos to me =)

My ah kor just broke up because he had a girl version of him...anyway i prayed those who broke up will eventually find love and continue to trust the appearance of true love....he/she will come..

" I am tired of being the only one missing you when you don't give a damn about me"

first day

Alright, it is getting really hard no to think about him....but i didnt text him or leave a msg in is facebook. well as starters, I was defeated by my own temptations and left a message for him, an offine message in MSN.Not that he will see it anyway, as i have thought, or maybe he did it again, block me....well, reminder to myself, i am still a friend to him, but like he and the rest said, I am not there doesn't mean i am less of a friend to him...what more, he still has my heart...so i pray hard to be able to transform myself back to the independent girl once more, having commitment issues was not a big deal anymore, just be myself, perhaps come back a little stronger..

" I need to know what i want to decide my journey alone"

paranoid

It is funny how i get paranoid so easily,by just someone calling my name in MSN or someone say hie and asked if i am there..and no reply after that...perhaps I was thinking too much and worrying to much. Especially when the message came from a friend who is from the same uni as him. I was worried that something bad or unfortunate had happened to him and worried sick for the whole day, well i think nothing actually happened to him because he was on facebook 2 hours ago to leave a message.Silly me...but thank God everything was fine...hope everything is always fine for him...

sigh, my disappearance form your world didn't work...so sorry about that message from another friend, i tried to make you less guilty but i think i failed, So So sorry...

" I cannot imagine my reaction and feelings if anything bad happened to you, so please take care and be happy, i know you will"

Hurdle

I think I am the hurdle that will make you fall,

I remove myself from your road,

Your path will be smoother,

I will still be a friend forever, though I am gone....

" the hurdle is gone, you are free to run on the clear road to your destiny"

Sem

last sem i hope this would be a better semester,

this sem turned out worst, very much worst

I lose someone i love very much, not to death but to distance, commitment problems and studies/work.

I lose a probably best friend of all best friends

I lose a close friend

My grandma was admitted twice to the hospital for broken bones.

I lose a little of myself as day passes by

Well, a great lesson learn, to fight till i have no regrets and fight for what i think is worth it, tho i may lose

I learnt, that there is a lesson in every goodbye

i learnt to face the ugly truth.. yes i did have many unforgettable experiences this semester...let's hope next semester will be a better one..

I marched on, not as a crying baby, but with a grace of an adult, a young lady, and promise with much avoidance never to be hurt again or think about it again.....i will survive...

" The problem is love, and it means me, and now i have to minus you, figuring out next"

i cried again

he called

i lied

he spoke, he cared, he asked, i answered

i feel akward

i feel sad

i tell myself i am nothing to him

perhaps i am really nothing to him

" when i wanted you to tell me that you don't love me, i lied"

I am hormonal!!

PMS is a bitch....why? because I am out of control and my emotions are running wild...

1. I made someone who probably have the feeling of killing me.
2. or perhaps i made that someone feel annoyed but had to say he is not annoyed coz monday is my exam.
3. or perhaps i have hurt him...
4. i am wasting my time doing nothing
5. letting my wild emotions envelope my soul..
6. and i am about to ask,wait i just asked a dumbass question and now either waiting for a reply that might send my tear glands starts functioning or without a reply and make me wonder and think pathetically.

I am pathetic, but don't blame me, blame the hormones in me!

" I have no idea why I am only allowing you to make my heart skip a beat in excitement and my lips to curve up again and missing 0ut on the others"

Blame it on the hormones

It feels wrong, but last night when you talked to me and show me your care i feel like telling you that i love and right now i am missing you badly.......i wish i could tell you all this...

" PMS brings out everything I tried so hard to suppress, just when I though I am Ok"

Shoot me!

It had been a tiring, hectic and there were many rushing for time moments took place in my life for the passed few weeks and it is going to start all over again starting from now at this very moment. Adrenaline rush and complex mechanism taking place in my body, assisting my brain to function better continues on...
I am no machine,
I am only human,
How long can I take it?

Ironically, I seemed to be enjoying the process of completing assignments..Patience level are lowered and so is my temper threshold, but working with friends, the laughter still continues on no matter how tired we are. And when the end product is achieve, and mission accomplished, the sense of accomplishment and satisfaction replaces everything else....and the feeling is great,and soon enough we realize the whole process was indeed an insightful learning process and testing how far we can go... got to stay positive =)

" No matter what happen, you still manage to steal a moment of my thought- good or bad, you tell me"

Breath

Another Taylor Swift song here, coz i feel in. In the moments of stress and tiredness, i am more emotional and less rational. Breathe.....

Breathe
I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people and sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time

Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm
Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm

Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see
'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down
Now I don't know what to be without you around

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand

And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

Never wanted this, never want to see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve
People are people and sometimes it doesn't work out
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand

And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me
It's two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know this ain't easy, easy for me

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me, oh

I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe
Without you, but I have to

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry

" I can live and breathe without you, just that sometimes you make it easier for me"

You Belong With Me

You Belong With Me by Taylor Swift
"You Belong With Me"

You're on the phone
With your girlfriend
She's upset
She's going off about
Something that you said
'cause she doesn't get your humor
Like I do

I'm in the room
It's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music
She doesn't like
She'll never know your story
Like I do

But she wears short skirts
I wear t-shirts
She's cheer captain
And I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time

If you could see
That I'm the one
Who understands you
Been here all along
So why can't you
See you belong with me
You belong with me.

Walking the streets
With you and your worn out jeans
I can't help thinking
This is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench
Thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile
That could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in awhile
Since she brought you down
You say you're fine
I know you better than that
Hey what you doing
With a girl like that

She wears high heels
I wear sneakers
She's cheer captain
I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time

If you could see
That I'm the one
Who understands you
Been here all along
So why can't you
See you belong with me
Standing by and
Waiting at your backdoor
All this time
How could you not know
Baby
You belong with me
You belong with me.

[Instrumental]

Oh, I remember
You driving to my house
In the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh
When you know you're about to cry
And I know your favorite songs
And you tell me about your dreams
Think I know where you belong
Think I know it's with me

Can't you see
That I'm the one
Who understands
Been here all along
So why can't you see?
You belong with me.

Have you ever thought
Just maybe
You belong with me?


Hmmm...am i the girl to bring you down or the girl who makes u laugh.... i wonder...

" Guess i will never know the answer, just let time tell, if you belong to me"

Green + insane

I am turning green, not green environment but green because of jealousy...of people around me and around him.

I am going insane, with so many things happening....

" like you say: as the going gets tough, tough gets going, but what if I am not tough enough? "

US

We can make it happen, trust me, i believe we can go through this trial, and soon we will be US once again.....

I believe in you ( Il Divo duet Celine Dion)

Lonely
The path you have chosen
A restless road
No turning back
One day you
Will find you light again
Don't you know
Don't let go
Be strong

Follow you heart
Let you love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you

Follow your dreams
Be yourself, an angel of kindness
There's nothing that you can not do
I believe, I believe, I believe
In you.

Tout seul
Tu t'en iras tout seul
Coeur ouvert
A L'univers
Poursuis ta quete
Sans regarder derriére
N'attends pas
Que le jour
Se léve

Suis ton étoile
Va jusqu'ou ton reve t'emporte
Un jour tu le toucheras
Si tu croix si tu croix si tu croix
En toi
Suis la lumiére
N'eneins pas la flamme que tu portes
Au fonds de toi souviens-toi
Que je croix que je croix que je croix
Que je croix
En toi

Someday I'll find you
Someday you'll find me to
And when I hold you close
I'll know that is true

Follow your heart
Let you love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe in you

Follow your dreams
Be yourself, an angel of kindness
There's nothing that you can not do
I believe, I believe, I believe
in you

" I believe in us, like u have told me before- so now tell me what is love?"

Central

So I did what i felt like doing,
Ask what i need to ask,
Accept what the solution is,
Compromise and start all over again,
One month once, one chance every month,
One promise,one agreement,
Till we meet again,
You will always be on my mind...

" I knew i was right..this crazy little thing call love"

of boredom, tiredness and jealousy

I am bored of my life...
Tired of what i am doing,
Bored of my lame excuses,
Tired of trying to hard,
And jealous of happily ever afters, which is not destined for me at the moment...

" Just 2 days away, things did not turn out as planned,but I only have one chance, i hope i wont screw it- trying too hard not to love"

if only

 If only i could tell you right now, like i always do that i love you,

if only i could still tell you that i miss you without feeling sinful,

if only you would feel the same way....

"there are six billion people in this world, six billion hearts, but only one heart will make a difference in my life, and i want that heart to be yours"